So you are having a nice conversation with a girl, she is laughing at your jokes, you are vibing, all is going well. 

All of a sudden you think “Man I should get her number” 

And everything falls apart. You start looking for a good opportunity, teasing her to get a reaction that will give you an opening to finally ask for it and when you finally do, you get “Oh how about an Instagram?” 

Instead do this:

Act immediately as your thought pops up in your head. Not in the next moment, this moment. Doesn’t matter if she is in the middle of the sentence. Take your phone out, pull up a number keyboard and give it to her. Act like it’s nothing. 

If she asks something like “What?” don’t get confused, just say “Put your number in” – “Why?” “I wanna call you later and chat” And that will usually do it.

 If she tries going for the Instagram, you gotta gage the situation.

For example if you have not built enough trust and dynamics so she can freely give you her number with clear image in her head as to why she is doing that, you probably went in to early (not in time, but in the steps)

She first has to understand why are you approaching. This can be to have sex, but also to have a fun conversation, to share an opinion, to express something you found funny, to see what kind of a girl she is, to just meet another girl you found interesting. So there are many possibilities of why someone approaches. 

You should make it clear from the first 2 seconds that you are not selling anything and that you don’t need anything from her. 

After those 2 prerequisites are met, you have 2 minutes to move things further.

This is where you build trust and you find a common interest.

Not in order to get something from her later, but in order to connect and build rapor. 

If you have sexual intentions you don’t have to show it, just don’t communicate in a friendly manner, slow down your talk, zone into her eyes and move the conversation from the atmosphere of I’m a random dude approaching you to I’m a random dude you are now sharing a moment with. This creates a bubble around you two and that builds trust. 

Depending of a girl she will react in a couple of different ways in these situations. Some will push back, others will lean in, others will get scared and confused, some girls are very shy. 

The point is that you are now creating a situation in which you are a man,  leader and she is a woman, a follower and she should be able to trust your leadership and be able to surrender to it.

This is a lot to ask for from a 2 minute conversation, but girls want to do this and they have sensors to find leaders around them. These sensors will trigger as soon as you make such invitation. 

This will open up your conversation because now she will naturally want to find out more about you.

Of course the world is chaotic and it’s more likely that the girl is going to be in her own movie, coming from one place and going to another, and that is completely fine. 

It’s your job to recognize that she is probably not yet aware of what is going on. That’s why we are not stopping girls unless we are super in the zone. We go with and that gives us time to set the expectations and the intentions of the conversation.

If what you’ve read just now sounds hard, it’s because you are too selfish to see the situation from the girls perspective.

You are not God’s miracle.

You have to prove to the girl that you are not a psycho trying to take her kidneys. 

You are a guy with good intentions who is trying to meet a girl.

If you come up as insincere she will sense it. If you try to pull some trick, she will sense it. Don’t do it.

Be who you are and improve to a point when girls actually want to talk to you.

Back to the number. See when you open up the conversation and set clear intentions, she will be thrilled to give you her number so you could continue what you’ve started at a more appropriate time.

And that my guys is how you get the number the right way.